Mike Gundy named offensive coordinator at Twilie

Mike Gundy named offensive coordinator at Twilie

By Weidu Hai
Ponyville Express
February 1, 2017

That didn't take long, now did it?

You can pencil in those pass-happy, run-and-gunning Twilight Sparkle Unicorns as prohibitive favorites to win the big one all over again. After a terrible 4-8 season at Oklahoma State that led to his dismissal as head coach of the Cowboys, Mike Gundy was hired as the offensive coordinator of the Twilight Sparkle Unicorns, replacing Yukari Akiyama, who, in a twist of irony was named the new head coach of the Cowboys.

"Mike is a guy that knows how to get the most out his players, especially the playmakers on our team," said Unicorns head coach M.A. Larson at the press conference at Strong Convocation Center. "He brings a wealth of experience and a deep knowledge of the game of football, and the intricacies associated with it. Furthermore, he's a coach that knows how to develop leaders out of the everyman, and we are more than happy to have him on board."

"Let me say that Miss Twilight here is not only a wonderful pony, but a sure-as-hay gorgeous fine young lady," Gundy said, drawing some perverted snickers from the press. 

"All joking aside, I am glad to be a part of this team. Twilight Sparkle and the Pony Conference are the finest best-kept secret in all of college football. The teams in this conference are impressive and can hold their own against anybody.

"My job to make sure Twilight's high-powered offense stays high-powered. You're going to see excitement, a lot of fun and a lot of great talent don the purple of the Unicorns. Some name that is. I'll take that over Appleknockers. I'm from Oklahoma and that a bit too Missourian for my taste. Twilie's students appreciate winning and live and die by it, and it's going to be up to us to deliver results.

"All in all, I'm excited to be the new offensive coordinator here. Let's go ahead and get to work and bring some more of those championship trophies home to Ponyville."