Big Mac earns comeuppance in Great Cider Drink-Off
By Rawls Jennet
The Orchard
July 3, 2012
As a result of Applejack State Appleknockers coach Big Macintosh messing around with Mr. Smartypants this past month, he was forced to try and outdrink the university's founder, Applejack, in a cider drink-off at The Tavern, located on campus.
Turns out, he lost. Applejack beat her big brother by one stein. As a penalty, Big Mac was forced to eat a tablespoon of hot pepper powder while heading to the restroom.
"I had to give my brother a piece of my mind," Applejack said afterwards. "You don't mess with dolls like that. I don't care what your intention is, you leave those things to the fillies and go back to doing what colts are made to do, y'know what I mean?"
"I lost, plain and simple," Big Macintosh commented. "I got nothing left to say."
The good news was that the cider did not have any alcohol, so both competitors were able to remain sober and return to their work as University President and head football coach, respectively. Thus, an hour following the drink-off, both were back on campus, doing their roles with ease.
The schedule for Applejack State's inaugural football season will be announced later this month.
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