Ouch! Twilight routs Wisconsin, 255-28

Ouch! Twilight routs Wisconsin, 255-28

By Lex Luthor
The Daily Twilight
August 25, 2012

Twiilight Sparkle, the president of her own namesake university, received a phone cal from her brother, Shining Armor. "Uh, Twilie, was it really necessary for [head coach] Derpy [Hooves] to run it up on Wisconsin?" he asked.

"Hey, I'm only the founder and president, not the coach. Even I am embarrassed by this scoreline," she replied tersely. "Derpy is dancing like an idiot on the sidelines; it's not my problem."

Even still, this would elicit some big shock waves in college football. The No. 16 Wisconsin Badgers could be tumbling out of the Top 25 after a historic 255-28 upset. The game was highlighted by the 39 interceptions both Badger quarterbacks threw, along with the numerous records that fell for most touchdowns scored, most receiving touchdowns, passing yards, interceptions in a game, longest interception return for a score, and so on and so forth.

"This was a fun night of football, and what makes it even sweeter was that this was the only Week 1 matchup," Derpy said. "I love a nice plot-bucking every now and then, and I hope we do the same to Alabama next week."

"I got nothing to say on this performance," Wisconsin coach Bret Bielema said. "What do you want me to tell you? That Wisconsin scored 28 points on Twilight's defense? That we coughed up 39 interceptions? That we didn't even bother to try to win this one? I told you everything you bastards need to know. I'm out of here."

The Wisconsin coaches and players were unavailable for comment following the game.

Next week, Twilight Sparkle continue their season at home against the Alabama Crimson Tide.